Five Influences of Sexual Activity

You remember what it was like as a teen? The pressure was unreal, and kids these days have it even worse. It is coming at them from all sides, especially as we move deeper into a high tech world. Kids today are up against a lot when it comes to making a responsible decision about sex.

1. First they have HORMONES; all those chemicals are just raging inside complicating an already confusing period in a teen's life. Teens need reassured that it is a natural process, that it is normal to have impulses, and that they do have the self-control not to act on those impulses.
2. MEDIA is a huge factor influencing young minds about sex. Everywhere you turn on TV, the movies, music, and the internet we are constantly bombarded with mixed messages about relationships and sexuality. You are never going to be able to shelter your teen from all of the media so instead use it as a teaching tool. When you hear a song with lyrics of a sexual nature or see a sitcom that glamorizes a casual sexual relationship take that opportunity to have a conversation with your teen about your family values regarding sex, what makes a healthy relationship, your teen's feelings about how sex is portrayed, etc. Take back the power and make media into a teaching tool in your home.
3. You do your best to raise them right and instill all of your core values in your teen but it never fails that they will go out into the world and encounter PEERS who will introduce a different perspective to your teen. Teens are social creatures they need to be and enjoy being with other people, that is the norm. However, it becomes problematic when they find themselves in situations where they feel they have to act against what they know to be right in order to still be a part of a social network. It is not enough to know who your kid's friends are anymore. You have to arm them with the tools to resist peer pressure. Teens know that they are supposed to say no, but what they really need from the adults in their lives is to know why and how to say no. It may surprise you to know that a 1000 sexually experienced teen girls were asked what they would like to know about sex and 85% said "How to say no without hurting the other person's feelings". Encourage your teen to visit the Totally for Teens pages and learn how to Take a Stand against unwanted peer pressure.
4. It doesn't matter if you are young or old it is a well known fact that ALCHOHOL consumption impairs your judgment. So when teens, who are already naturally impulsive, become impaired by alcohol poor decision making increases ten fold. In a survey conducted by The National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy nearly 20% of girls and 30% of boys who reported being sexually active reported using alcohol before engaging in their most recent sexual activity. Three-fourths of sexually active teens surveyed reported that their very first sexual encounter occurred under the influence of alcohol.
5. Teens dating and in RELATIONSHIPS can be another huge factor influencing their choices about sexual activity. It is important for teens to understand the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships and to know that there is more to a romantic relationship than sexual activity. Being in love doesn't mean that you have to have sex. Once again it is essential that you equip your teen with the knowledge and tools to resist the pressure that can come from their romantic partner. Be firm about your core values and house rules and make sure that your expectations are communicated to your teen prior to them engaging in a relationship. For information for your teen on alternatives to engaging in sexual activity have them visit Instead of Having Sex in the Totally for Teens section of our web site.